Memorial Day Perspective from a Combat Wounded Green Beret, Now San Antonio, Texas Business Owner.

Memorial Day is traditionally marked by somber reflection and solemn remembrance. After serving as a Green Beret, and losing 4 men who were serving under my command as we returned from a mission, I find myself compelled to share a different perspective than the traditional script that is put out.

Yes, I have pain, every damn day, but I also have a responsibility and commitment, as service does not stop with retirement. So, as I sit in the airport and write this while I wait for my flight, strap in, as it may get a little bumpy. I am just going to shoot from the heart in this year's letter.

Yes, Memorial Day is a time to honor and remember those who have paid the ultimate sacrifice and died in service to our country. It's a day to pay tribute to the brave men and women who have given their lives to defend our freedoms. I encourage everyone to also take time today to respect and honor the families of our fallen servicemen and women. These Gold Star families are often overlooked when it comes to Memorial Day, let us remember those families who lost a part of themselves.

While we must never forget their sacrifices, I believe it is also important to celebrate the life we have and the resilience of those who have served. I often find myself wondering how I would feel if I were one of the men who lost their lives on that fateful night that my men died- September 15, 2009? I sit back and wonder what would I be thinking if it were me looking down upon the world. What would I want my family, friends, and those I served with doing? And then it hits me… hits me hard. I am sitting here in an airport writing this and crying over my breakfast, but then the tears rolling down my face suddenly get dried up as I am thinking about all the fun and good times I also had with the men I served with, and that’s it, I would want everyone that I loved to have the most amazing life possible, to go kick life in its ass, to spread joy, and to go celebrate the awesomeness of life that we have been blessed with. I would also appreciate the honor and respect. I would be happy that people took the time to call my family and toast one to the sky in my honor, but then I would want the tears to stop rolling and the laughter and joy to begin.

You see…far too often, we in the Veteran Community let our experiences control us, but we shouldn't. The best damn thing we can do to honor those that paid the ultimate sacrifice and their families is to live the best damn life we humanly can imagine and spread joy and opportunity to all within our influence, period. That's what we do.

Which brings me to my next topic - Suicide. Just Fucking STOP doing it! I get it. The struggle is real. The pain is real. I am tired of seeing wonderful men and women succumb to the demons of their service. It is time to own it as a community and help your friends and those you served with to hear the message above. Don’t let these demons control you and make the conscious decision that the pathway to honoring our people who lost their lives and to honor their families they left behind is to take that opportunity you have been given, called life. Live it to the best of your ability, in a way that feels right to YOU!!! Go have fun, and enjoy today. It’s okay to have a barbeque, it’s okay to go on a vacation and celebrate the day. Why? Because that’s exactly what those who lost their lives in support of our wonderful country would want you to do!

Let’s flip the script and stop looking to suicide as a solution to our problems and look those demons in the face and say never again, never again will I allow you to control me, never again will I allow you to stop honoring the memories of those I have served with. And NEVER AGAIN will I let one day pass me by without doing my absolute best to live it to its fullest.

In closing…

Today, on this Memorial Day, I want to take a moment to celebrate the warfighters who made the difficult decision to ask for HELP, and who did not let their demons get the most of them. We have some of these individuals working at our company today, and I am so proud to have them on the team. They have faced the horrors of combat and refuse to let their struggles define them. Heroes who have seen hard combat but continue to show up. People who re-defined their lives and found their reasons to live.

More than anything, I want everyone to appreciate this wonderful opportunity of life we have been blessed with. But I see so many of my fellow Veterans struggling, and unable to do just this. But I feel that changing that course starts with a decision, a decision to take action.

To those who are struggling on this Memorial Day, I beg you to redefine your ‘Why.’ Redefine your reason to stay in this current fight, If you are struggling, I beg you to ask for help and find your reason to start finding enjoyment in life. You can, and you will, with the right support. Find your spark, and nurse it until it grows bigger!

On this Memorial Day, I propose a different approach. Let's still take some solid moments to remember those we've lost, mourn their absence, and honor their memory. And let's also celebrate the resilience of our Veterans who continue to persevere. There is strength unlike any other.

Have a barbecue, and go save some money on appliances, all of that is totally okay. Also, it’s perfectly okay to gather with friends and family and enjoy the freedoms that those who paid the ultimate sacrifice fought and died for. And Always Remember that the best way to honor the fallen is by living our lives to the fullest.

Memorial Day is also a time to celebrate life. I can speak for my friends and fellow soldiers who are no longer with us and are looking down at us, and they don’t want to see their fellow warfighters living a sad day. They want to see us celebrating and appreciating the precious gift of LIFE and FREEDOM.

In loving memory always to Sgt. 1st Class Bradley Bohle, Sgt. 1st Class Shawn McCloskey, and Staff Sgt. Joshua Mills—you are forever ingrained in my heart.